my feelings.

i dunno why and what the hell has gotten into me.
i am thinking of him every single second.
this is weird. this is ABNORMAL.
abomination.
whatever.
i bet 1 million that he hates me like shit now
for all the things i've done.
ugh.
i'm such an ass.
i'm an ass,
an ass.
a pathetic ass.
assassassassassassassass
i've been freaking EMOING for two days.
because of him.
i am in so much pain now..

BUT.
does this mean that i like him?
but i am quite sure that i don't like like him.
sure, i like him a lot, as a friend.
and maybe more than a friend, ( a little or maybe more )
i dunno. i'm so confused now.
i need guidance or i think i'll kill myself.
and he hates me. ha hates hates hates me.










yeah, maybe i like him more than a friend
but not as much as a girlfriend boyfriend thing.
oh, i'm such a loser!
i hate myself for everything i've done.
it'll go away soon.
not for long and i'll be as happy as a lark again.
i will.
i'm such a lewser. a failure.
oh! i've got to stop this.


Dear Lord,
give me strenght and power so that i may overcome these.
lord, i pray to you,
be with me and guide me in everything that i'm doing.
without you, i am worthless.
with you by my side, i know that the impossible will
always be POSSIBLE.
lord god, help me .
lord, give me courage.
i pray to you.
amen.