changing slowly

Today, i will change.
and be a better person.
these are a list of my flaws:
1. emotional
2. impulsive
3. impatient
4. pessimistic
5. lazy
6. greedy

from today onwards, i will change.
for the sake of myself and my family
because i have been a terrible sister and a daughter
I...
have been unleashing my anger on my siblings.
which i shouldn't have done at the first place.
have also been very impolite to my parents.
especially to my mother.
i tend to get impatient when i'm talking to her,
i have NEVER respected her.
and everything she does for me,
i take them for granted.
i never say " thank you" for all the things that she has done for me.
i never, once in my 17 years of life, said " i'm sorry"
when i've done something wrong and hurt her.
what i do was COMPLAIN, COMPLAIN & complain.

it's hard to apologise because :
1. I always think that i'll do something stupid when i say those words like, burst into tears in front of my mom and it makes me look vulnerable.
2. I'm not good at saying this.
3. i have never said it before.

pathetic much?
totally.
and i know, those are lame reasons.
but they are TRUE.
no kidding.


宅女